We all have what it takes
Every day I meet talented people with all the knowledge, skills and qualities to be successful in their lives, and to ‘get their jobs done’. The sad thing though is they just do not see it themselves; their confidence does not match what they can actually do. Why is this?
Taking a step forward activates our saboteurs
In my CoActive Coaching training, I learned about out clients’ and my own saboteurs, or the ‘voices’ in our heads. As we try to take steps to move forward or change our lives, this movement activates these voices and they then try to slow us down.
Saboteurs have a purpose of maintaining our status quo or an equilibrium … helpful in some cases but not so much so when we are trying to live the fullest expression of our lives.
How do saboteurs come about
Saboteurs tend to birth themselves in our earlier years as we start to experience life, the good parts of it and also the not-so-good.
Especially in the latter’s case, when things are not going so well, we try to rationalise or use defense mechanisms to dampen any unpleasant feelings we might have with that.
If enough of this happens, we start to develop an ‘inner voice’ which tries to protect us by saying for example, “I am not good enough!” or “I am not worth it!” … and then we do not do the things we should be doing because we would rather save ourselves from the pain we think we might experience. See what TEDxStanford’s Shirzad Chamine has to say about it.
Can you or can’t you?
Saboteurs is complex stuff, and also very debilitating. As they say, “If you think you can do it, or you think you can’t … you will probably be right!”
If you allow your saboteurs to regularly talk and tell you cannot do things, then over time you will believe it and a self-fulfilling cycle is fueled, even though deep down you have everything you need to be successful.
Saboteurs can be managed
Saboteurs are engrained personifications with a purpose within all of us, and yet can be ‘easily’ managed.
My next blog will cover how you can manage your saboteurs. You can also contact me if you would like to know more.
So, in conclusion … head up, focus forward, always back yourself … and have a wonderful festive season!